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nual blum

by tay morehome

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1.
todito lo que te quiero hacer queda dando vueltas en mi esencia en mi ser pensando extrañando percibiendo saboreando soñando mojándome goteando con placer este es mi sueño fantasía hago lo que quiero es mi deseo y lo grito sin ningún miedo ya tu sabes a lo que vengo me vengo luego empieza suavecito lento el juego con la mirada me quitas el disfraz me dejas como soy entera te me doy me entrego me rindo te encuentro demasiado lindo quiero quedarme en tu nido pio pido  la verdad es que lo he pasado muy bien sin ti pero todo está distinto desde que te sentí mi piel me dice ya no quiere estar sin la tuya te invito a mi río pa que fluya  todo lo que traigo fluye con lo tuyo pena pedo miedo y orgullo acepto que no acepto estar sin ti probé de tu delicia y me fui  pero en los sueños sigo mordiéndote el cuello clavícula costilla y colmillo transcendemos la identidad voy pa tus orejas me muevo p’abajo  te alejas y te llamo de vuelta suelta la sobreanalización que te bloquea la comprensión ríndete a la sensación sanación llévalo por todo tu cuerpo inhalación  después exhalas todo moviendo tu raíz me rascas p’abajo causando slow release estado orgásmico soy el universo soy mis ancestros y nos unimos con lo cósmico y todo esto para decir que cruces el charco horizontalízame y mete tu barco a mi mar 
2.
a block from inspiration a hallway of sorts we’re in wherein all the little flower buds bloom within ideas and dreams bubble up like molten lava volcanically seeking its path before it’s cold and harder  step into my cave be still for a bit  listen to our brain heart body and spirit ’tis this one that knows the wider frame face pale and dampened like the ghost of my dream scare thee not lest this one’s alright as we come blessed paranoia in the night naysayer’s wish for all to feel so blind confusion’s dish served with aged fine wine oh why why oh why and when when and when and what what and what and who who and where where ?  patiently awaiting your last living breath last living death till the next one defiantly engaging your last blown attempt at raging with the waters till you get some get some get some rags times crimess like the goddess almahighty fervent xxrak from the depths of the underworld wa’a’swoosh xlaga  batter’s up to strike like maga maga smoo’ith me guys come to woo’iz me leaves me so woozy whoosh off with you off  push your sunken campaign for fame distract destruct who’s getting paid for us to live this way way out way out in space none of this matters rraka tss  but we’re free not even bound to this body and so we sing as though everybody’s listening and we will scream about the state and the hypocrisy this cruel machine eating alive all the souls and beings all the souls and beings 
3.
fall rolls in bringing with it little dewey drops of the unknown talk about a sin let the shiddy shadow shine bright on the hustlin give in to what we are little pitter patter of dust on a star what one said goes cause everyone knows compromise blows one unready to let go of followin their own flow two unsteady watch them grow from death we come to live a lucid life and get somethin done another family tree another story it seems like everyone’s important to somebody i left my love for another i followed my heart not my word one once said the story’s the same but the pair of feet change but i’ve observed through stories i’ve heard it’s never the same we’re always changing the we of yesterday is not the we of today
4.
why would we try to be anything other than the ashes ? ashes to ashes sift in the gray umbayulita doing the same all dry buds want to be shaken all loose leaves tumbled dry a long winter cry and a scalp long awaits a good scritchen consciously rerouting the maps between synapses dissolution of space time hair follicles drippin colors of all we’ve ever thought to have known i’m miggity melting smithereens undone unsung till now profound unraveling triggy traveling sounds unfound till they weren’t no more ask loud for the endowment of flavors your lone heart’s a craver no worry to savor not need to be saved by ya and melt
5.
ente'tain 03:02
i’ve been walking so long without knowing where i’m going and i’ve been singing all the same songs i don’t care to change that which isn’t broke but i’ve been known to hide sometimes within a sea of celestial skies and i will not resign and i’ve been talking so long without stopping to just listen  and i would feel much obliged to be the one to shut me up sometime yes i would yes i would be sometimes misunderstood things’ll come to pass sometimes they don’t always seem so right but they are they are they are  i was the one that you hardly ever saw cause i was tucked in my cave of solitude i really didn’t wanna talk to you i really don’t know why  do we look on the outside for the things that are really on the inside i’d rather die than waste alive entertain entertain entertain entertain accumulate
6.
i’ve been so tired  haven’t done anything for me uninspired the fire dimming down to nothing  i’m just trying divine trusting  another day another labor as a storm cloud rolls in in the form of a neighbor  such a silly circumstance slowly weening away from patience cause why would i  waste my sweet life  waiting a long spending my sweet time  how could i let go of these lies under a guise of sunshine chastise antagonize despise  devise a distraction and surmise  disguise your lies and scrutinize deny deny deny  and the world is so sick and tired of this kind  i’ll love you but i won’t live with you  how much bullshit could a bullshitter bullshit if a bullshitter could bullshit bullshit i say it like it is bullshit 
7.
got problems 03:55
i’m always barking up the wrong tree i'll call on anyone to save me  seem to have misplaced my peace pawing at the tree waiting for a remedy and i dream and i dream for another i can keep some never learn it seems just realize leave repeat keep rollin on keep rollin it rollin it on  and i ask you nicely keep me you must be thinking i'm so needy but the laze of the days bring deep healing sweet release it’s so damn sad to be the one who’s always waiting for another to be seen why's this existence feel so lonely ask for a lift ask for a little bit bit on the lip freudian slip consciously written  ask for a lick ask for a little dick slick like a slide i’ma lose it if i don’t get it get it get it on said it said it honestly left my tears on your bed with my blood it’s a problem yeah i got problems yeah we got problems  some would rather stay so busy , they don’t wanna look inside some would rather say they’re fine , they don’t wanna know what they’re missing and that’s fine , just give em time in time they’ll find … or not  wouldn’t wanna … try and make em  it’d be so 
8.
pop pop 03:50
all i’ve waited like a big balloon holding in the water like it wouldn’t let it go but it stretch so low it almost pop pop open with a biggy burst you never seen me at my worst all i’ve satiated on my own on my own time with my own rhymes stringing out my own lines i just resign to live laugh snuggle eat pray struggle love crumble dance trance die and it all wells up to the top top , all swells up like it gonna pop pop so easy and at the same time so hard and all the little people start to drop drop and their eager little lives get the stop stop go inside sit in silence and hide your humble wives  aaaaah so i’ll break it down down for any soft ill man boy in the woods , you’re only coulds but no one ever got satisfied like that that and with so many fish in the sea i throw back back and you thought you could and i thought you would but you didn’t once again so i cut my losses on what i spent it’s just you and the morning alone getting bent with no sin to repent repel me repeal this need repeating in we as well we and our need to be seen i’m feeling free letting go of you has always been the thing
9.
ocean side out tonight in our mind’s eye moonlight  out of sight out of mind and i wouldn’t  out of reach couldn’t touch me like you used to didn’t you didn’t you didn’t didn’t  wasn’t it wasn’t it dissonant distance  dissed by a kiss ungiven lonesome unkempt unkissed lips it slips away and goes down to the ground where it meets with the rain mix with a sinful soul so riddled with pain is just a way to say you’re here is where i’ve buried all my bones skins and nails  so don’t ask me to be nothing it’s just me and it’s you i’m loving uncovering soft i’m lost , warm i’m torn i’d sworn to wait for the one who could hold me  host me home , and mooooooan  and moan moan in the morning the morning morning
10.
acantilado 03:24
desde hace tanto siento un vacío en el pecho  viento que me jala cada vez mas lejos y lento miento cuando digo que no necesito a nadie momento perdido en el olvido del viaje el mismo patrón que siempre eternamente repitiéndose  quizás algún día lo aprenda pero no es el día de hoy mañana me toca dejarme dejar de apapacharme volar adonde me lleven las alas volar con ojos de águila  voy por desesperación al borde del acantilado caigo en la tentación dejé mi vida entera pasar y ya cuando miro alrededor veo que nadie me ve resulta triste aceptar que lo vivido ya se fue así pasa el tiempo así que quiero que me toques 
11.
new day 04:29
12.
the world 03:58
i don’t care what anybody else  has to say about how i’m living  knowing it’s all up inside the self really didn’t matter what the rest did anyway lately i been thinking bout the earth that good good just keep on spinning hail to the death and to the birth some'll have to go if we gon keep on making babies  and lord knows we gon keep making em  making em em making em make  making em making em making em make  and we gon keep on dying  look at the world how could it be i call upon the roots and the trees  look at the world how could it be i call upon the rivers and the seas look at the people how they divide maybe it’s harder to love than to fight everyone claiming ideas are true if you don’t see it like me then fuck you  well fuck you and fuck you too i love you and i love you too
13.
confusion 03:34
change come upon like a giant footed ..  waiting to blow as quick slick sour drips low lustrous tightening love to spite ye slow unwinding creepy cryptic sight psych my minding ignite conscious  writhing through the fight i’ve not lost this  think between the lines ungodly time to be alive  i’dn’t thought this for anyone in these rhymes gone to shit thereby walk the list oh my doctor’s pissed i lied said i’d not resist  i tried but repression act a bitch wishing to desist the active pit of pandering lives like slandering wives gone down to the wayside where the ocean meets the breeze there’s a garden where anyone can go be free  you get the gist with a swift transition wistfully looking to bind your life with one of your choosing chk chk illusion  chk chk chk chk i really think i’m losing it confusion  all that was lost in the fight revive all that was lost will return in time i find that the other ones on the other side find right their only ways to feign delight so in humble prayer we align if i learned one thing it’s that what i been doing don’t work barking up trees look the other way till the feeling gets shirked  bitter thoughts spilling through and all i can do  is sit in my fantasy world and lurk blasted sarcastic game i play with myself and wake up in the dirt sometimes i feel so unwell  i need some help to get me out of this hell  a tight cage i’ve built around my self like a jail cell dissolve and i jump from the cliff in a last ditch effort to sail away where the ocean meets the gardens the breeze and the waves  i give thanks 

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released January 28, 2021

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tay morehome Chis., Mexico

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